Ep. 18: Pranks for the Privy
Privy Pranks: Toilet-Based Tomfoolery You’ll Laugh About Later (Maybe)
Bathroom prank.
Whether you’re a master trickster or a frequent victim, this post is your ultimate guide to lavatory-based shenanigans. It’s part warning, part tutorial, and entirely full of crap—sometimes literally.
Welcome to April Fool's, Bathroom Edition
Ah yes, April 1st—the holiday where trust goes to die and ne'er-do-wells rise from their stinky thrones to prank their friends and family.
Before we begin: please remember the Golden Rule of Bathroom Pranks:
If it causes actual damage or trauma, it's not a prank. It’s a lawsuit.
This guide is meant to inspire harmless fun, not give you a record. So prank responsibly.
The Two Categories of Bathroom Pranks
All bathroom pranks fall into two types:
Gross-Out Gags – Designed to trigger the “EWWWW” face.
Scare-Your-Soul Pranks – Designed to make someone pee before they even sit down.
Let’s look at the best—and worst—of both.
Honorable Mentions: Spooky But Low Effort
• Spider in the Toilet
Nothing says “good morning” like a rubber tarantula in the bowl. Works equally well with fake cockroaches, snakes, or, if you’re evil, a Barbie doll head.
• Toilet Paper Art Attack
Draw creepy things (like spiders or faces) on the roll a few sheets down. As they unroll… BAM! Instant jump scare.
• Gag Store Toilet Seat Inserts
For $20, you too can own a toilet seat decal of a monster mouth, a blood pool, or something that will get used exactly once before everyone is wise to it.
“Is That... Someone Behind Me?” Pranks
• Cutout Creep
Print out a face (Nicolas Cage, Gollum, your mom) and tape it behind the shower curtain or bathroom door. The only thing scarier than spiders in the toilet? Unexpected Cage.
• Mirror Monster
Tape your creepy cutout in the mirror’s reflection zone. Bonus points if they don't notice until they’re brushing their teeth and scream with a mouth full of toothpaste foam.
Toilet Startlers (Advanced Users Only)
• Airhorn Surprise
This one’s engineering-heavy but oh-so-effective. Tape an airhorn under the toilet seat so it blasts when someone sits down. Note: this may cause actual “accidents.”
• Poop Goes the Weasel
Place small firecracker-style poppers under the toilet seat’s contact points. When the person sits—SNAP! Sounds like someone’s butt just fired a warning shot.
Gross-Out Zone: Proceed With Caution
• Fake Bodily Fluid Kits
Everything from rubber poop and plastic vomit to pee-colored goo can be bought online. Is it mature? No. Is it effective? Debatably.
• Saran Wrap Surprise
Cover the toilet bowl with clear plastic wrap under the seat. Results vary:
Pee = splashy disaster.
Poop = horrifying sensation of “why won’t it go down??”
Also, Saran Wrap doesn’t flush. So be ready to clean up the crime scene.
Expo Marker Mayhem
Unroll a bit of toilet paper, draw brown streaks with a marker, roll it back up, and wait. They’ll think the TP is pre-used. Bonus: zero actual poop involved!
Vaseline Shenanigans
Smear Vaseline:
On the toilet seat (hello, slippery surprise!)
On the faucet handle (ew, why is it greasy?)
Or, if you’re unhinged, on the doorknob—now it’s a trap room.
The Infamous Upper Decker
WARNING: This is not for the faint of nose.
An Upper Decker is when someone poops in the tank, not the bowl. Every flush releases eau de sewer.
Alternative for the squeamish: Dump Swiss Miss cocoa mix up there. It smells delicious but looks like a chocolate crime scene.
The Nutella Disaster
This one’s a classic:
Yell, “Hey! I need TP!” from the bathroom.
Secretly smear Nutella on your hand.
As your helpful friend hands you a roll… “accidentally” brush their hand.
It's safe, hilarious, and they think they just got poopified. Just don't try it with strangers unless you like lawsuits.
The Crotch Bomb & Other Horrors
Got access to someone’s undies? (Please explain how.)
Sprinkle itch powder, Icy Hot, or even chili powder in the, uh, "zone."
Watch the chaos.
Prepare for war.
PSA: Don’t be this person unless you’re okay getting it back tenfold.
Tales from the Toilet Trenches
1. Airhorn Ambush
In high school, my friends duct-taped an airhorn “on” and tossed it into the girls’ sleeping quarters during a youth trip. Chaos. Screaming. Justice.
We were caught. Worth it.
2. Geometry Class Firecrotch
A classmate named “Dereme” once sat through math with a twitchy face. Turns out someone smeared Icy Hot in his jockstrap. His discomfort was our education.
3. Poop Volcano
Picture it: high school boys’ bathroom. One toilet. Multiple dudes taking turns... contributing.
They created a mountain of poop so tall it rose above the bowl line.
They had to clean it. Let this be a cautionary tale, not an inspiration.
